How To Support A Friend Who’s Miscarried

I have two beautiful daughters. But, before they came along I had every dream and hope of becoming a mom. We did all the right steps, we bought a house and got a dog. Then, we tried for a baby and I got pregnant! Except for months later we went in to the doctor and couldn’t hear the heartbeat. It was heartbreaking. We tried again after a couple months and got pregnant for a second time and again, I miscarried. I was beginning to lose hope. I was very open on social media and with friends and family. We decided from the beginning that a life was to be celebrated no mater how big or small that life was. After a few months, we got pregnant with our oldest daughter, Alexa. But, I learned a lot through that season. I learned to never lose hope and that God’s always got our back. I’ve had a few people reach out to me for advice for themselves during their miscarriage or ask me how they can help a hurting friend who’s walking through this. So, I’d like to give you some ideas on how to show you care to someone who’s heart is breaking during this time.

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Bring them a meal
It doesn’t matter where they are in the process of miscarrying. Bringing a meal shows you care and lets them not have to worry about dinner.

Send them a box
I found out about Hannah’s Hope Box when I had my miscarriages. It is a great organization. For $28, you can give a box that includes the book “Grieving the child I never knew” (Great read), a Christmas ornament, a couple items to remember your baby by and some other neat things.

Check in with them
Text them. Ask how they’re doing. Bring them coffee. Ask if you can do anything for them.

Quit saying I’m sorry
There were so many times that I just wanted people to say “this sucks”. That sounds rude, but I was so tired of people saying I’m sorry.

Send them a card or flowers
Send them an encouraging card. Whether it has scripture or a kind message, it will uplift their spirit and know they are not alone.

Don’t be afraid to talk about it
I’m a pretty open person, so this may vary from person to person. But, I didn’t like it when people pretended like everything was normal and we were just going to cover it up pretend it never happened.

Pray for them
This is going to be one of the hardest things that person will walk through. It will be hard on their spiritual walk, on their marriage, their work life and their personal life. They will need lots of prayer to get them through this time. 

 

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